Funny Mom Story Contest

A Poo Poo Pickle by Amy

I was brave or stupid, to go to Khols with three children 4, 2 and 3 weeks. I was trying to nurse discreetly as we were checking out. My 4 year old boy was hopping around under a clothing rack, bumped his head, all the while I was just somewhat ignoring his failed attempt at getting attention. Waiting for my receipt my two year old was standing by the entrance yelling UH OH! I look closer and see her holding her dress up, the pull up is broken, and poop was tempting to fall out! What chaos!

Clever Frosting Caper by Cumorah

I came downstairs after putting the baby down for a nap and saw my 3 year old wrestling with a tub of sealed frosting. I sat back & watched to see what she would do when she realized that she couldn’t open it. She is a resourceful little soul! She found one of her play kitchen knives and jabbed it through the foil seal. She brought the knife back out and licked off a snitch of frosting. She was plunging it back in for seconds when I snuck up behind her and exclaimed, “What are you doing?” Without missing a beat, she held up the frosting with the knife sticking out the top and said, “Oh look Mom! I found my knife!”

F by Aimee

 "Mommy, what's sex" I inquired as any curious 7 year old would. My mom gripped the steering wheel with great force. Driving, coupled with this sensitive question, was almost too much for her. A brief, mumbled string of words resulted. Not satisfied, I probed deeper. She searched for an appropriate response, coming up short. Finally, she asked why I needed to know. Being just exposed to the importance of grades in school, I held up her license innocently & asked why she got an F in sex.

The Pool by Wendy

The summer my youngest was about 3 we went to the pool. The light in the bathroom was out so I had to change in the dark. I put my dress and undies back on and we went to the store. Some firemen came to talk to him and he got shy and hid behind me. Then he lifted my dress up high and went under it and firemen laughed. It wasn't till we got home that I realized that my undies on inside out and there was a maxi pad on the OUTSIDE of my panties! I still can't look firemen in the eyes!

Fat Tummy by Pam

When I was 4 months along with my 2nd child, I still hadn't explained it really to my first. One morning she told me that my stomach was getting fat and I decided that I would tell her then. So I sit her down and tell her that there is a baby in my tummy, and next thing I know, she is crying and running out of the room. A few minutes later my husband comes in and tells me that she is scared to be around me because she thinks I'm going to eat her. It took a while for her to trust me after that.

Emergency or Not? By Vicki

Police in our area have buttons on their radio for emergencies & are ONLY to push them for an officer related emergency. If the button is pushed, every officer’s radio & city-wide alarms start shrieking. My husband was home eating lunch one day when we heard a BEEP and alarms echoing through the radio! The dispatcher came across his radio “T-11, is there an emergency?" My 15 month old saw the pretty orange button and had decided to push it! We had to explain to the dispatcher that there was no emergency & that our son pushed the button!