"Mommy brain: when your grey matter turns into grey hair..." Ian Nelson
"I suffer from M.A.D.D. - Mommy Attention Deficit Disorder." ~Raenita
"The phrase " working mother " is redundant." ~Jane Sellman
"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. ~Erma Bombeck
"I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on." ~Roseanne Barr
"Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard" ~ Author Unknown
"You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back." ~William D. Tammelus
"Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life." ~ Author Unknown
"Any mother could perform the jobs of several air-traffic controllers with ease." ~ Lisa Alther
"A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. " ~Peter De Vries
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." ~Rajneesh
"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." ~Elizabeth Stone
"If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylum would be filled with mothers." ~Edgar Watson Howe
"If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?" ~Milton Berle
"I know how to do anything - I'm a Mom." ~Roseanne Barr
"It's not easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it." ~The Golden Girls
"The hand that rocks the cradle usually is attached to someone who isn't getting enough sleep." ~ John Fiebig
"I'd like to be the ideal mother, but I'm too busy raising my kids." ~Unknown
"Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going." ~ Phyllis Diller
"It is amazing how quickly the kids learn the operation of the DVD, yet are unable to understand the vacuum cleaner." ~Etienne Marchal
"Raising a kid is part joy and part guerilla warfare." ~Ed Asner
"By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class." ~Anne Morrow Lindbergh
"A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take." -- Cardinal Mermillod
"A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary." -- Dorothy Canfield Fisher
"Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother's love is not." -- James Joyce
"Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president, but they don't want them to become politicians in the process." -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy
"Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother." -- Lin Yutang
"To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power." -- Maya Angelou
"There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world." -- William Ross Wallace
"I'm a mother with two small children, so I don't take as much crap as I used to." — Pamela Anderson
"There is no friendship, no love, like that of the parent for the child." -- Henry Ward Beecher
“A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.” -Tenneva Jordan
